Chapter 84: My Answering Machine

bbbbbbbbbeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeppppppppppppp


Hello you have reached the office of Mother.
Please listen carefully to the following message for your menu options:

Press 1 - if you forgot your homework, library book, or lunch money, even though Mother reminded you at least 14 times to put it in your backpack.

Press 2 - if you want to complain because Mother is to strict and expects you to do your chore the right way.

Press 3 - if you want to complain because Mother "actually" makes you brush your teeth, simply because Mother is the one paying for the Dentist bill.

Press 4 - if you want an allowance but do not want to help Mother with anything to earn it.

Press 5 - if you don't care that gas is expensive and it shouldn't matter if Mother is waiting on you so she can take you to soccer, dance, piano, scouts, karate, activity days, primary activities, and any other thing that may come up at any given moment.

Press 6 - if you dislike what Mother has made for Breakfast.

Press 7 - if you dislike what Mother has made for Dinner.

Press 8 - if you think Mother is crazy in saying that "beating up your siblings is NOT an appropriate form of excercise."

Press 9 - if you think Mother is wrong at all times and in all places and about all things; past, present and future.

Press 0 - if you would like Mother to translate this message in "whinese".





Please hold while I transfer you to this extension.............


Your call is very important to us, please continue to hold.................................


your call will be answered in the order it was received, your approximate wait time is.............................5 years, 7 months, 9 days, 1 hour and 34 minutes.







If you have reached this message, and still can't get you complaint addressed, please hang up and try doing what Mother asks, without arguing, without negotiating, the way you were taught, the first time asked!!

Thank you and have a nice day!!!